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Chasing Happy – Finding Myself….Again

Chasing Happy – Finding Myself….Again

Out for a walk

I love my life. I love being a parent, a wife, an entrepreneur and a blogger. Unfortunately sometimes it call all get a bit overwhelming and I am left wondering where I am and what I need to do next.

Should I get a job?

Should I chase more work?

Should I just pack it in and sit on the couch and eat bon bons?

And then I remember the reason I decided to stay at home to begin with….

Evan….

and then I remember that next year he will be changing to a school across town that I will need to drive him to. So yeah…another job is probably not the best idea.

But what about me? Where does that leave me?

And yes I do realize this sounds like a selfish thing to say but I’ll own it. I am not one of those people that can put my feelings in a box to be the most wonderful wife and mother. I want to be a great wife and mother, yes, but I also need to feel some amount of personal fulfillment.

So this week, I got myself up off the couch, I turned off netflix and closed my laptop. The first thing I did was go through my closet and get rid of a GOB of clothes. Most are too small for me now. Many are too dressy because I no longer go to the office. I shed all those things that were reminders of what I used to be. You see, I am no less than I was when I was thinner or when I went in to an office every day.

I’m just different.

And different is a-okay.

Then I packed for my trip to a blogger conference in Scottsdale, AZ and got my nails done. Yep, I get to feel pretty even when I’m not the same as I was before.

I put on my sassy new leggings and my jean jacket and said “Yep. Looking pretty good. Not skinny. Not corporate. Just me.”

And for the first time in months. I feel like I’ve found me again. Right where I left me…I just forgot to look.

 

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